


He

by orphan_account



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-23
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 23:00:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2829161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael was a <em>boy</em>, and that's all he wanted people to address him as, so why were they insisting on "she" and "her" and "Miss"? Why would only one person call him what he wanted? How was that fair?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please note that although I am writing Michael as a transboy in this fic, I am in fact a cisgirl, and so if I write something incorrectly or offend you, please tell me, and I will change it as soon as I possibly can, as I have no personal experience with trans* issues apart from knowing a few people, and so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.

Michael closed his eyes as he pulled his shirt off, slowly opening his eyes, seeing himself in his mirror across the room. He sighed softly, walking over to it, looking at himself in disappointment.

He was all soft with lovely curves, which would have been perfect if he was a girl. But Michael was a  _boy_ , and every day, he fought to remind himself of that fact. All he wanted was for people to address him as such, but it never worked.

Michael sighed, prodding at his squishy chest and turning to look at himself from the side, shaking his head.

“Fuck you, I’m a boy.”

Michael dressed himself, uncomfortable as always with the way that his chest made his shirt stick out and how people looked at him as he got onto the school bus, plopping down into his usual seat. Time for another day of constant misgendering.

**-:-:-:-:-**

Michael closed his locker, shifting his History textbook to his hip, stopping as he saw a tall, blond boy talking to someone who had once told Michael that he’d make him feel like the prettiest girl that had ever existed.

And he had been very nice and sweet to Michael on their handful of dates, and even after, but that had been two years ago, before Michael had figured out that he didn’t want to be a pretty girl, he just wanted to be a boy.

“Amelia! Come here, I wanna introduce you to someone!”

Michael closed his eyes for a moment, mentally calming himself, before walking over.

“Hi.”

“Amelia, this is Luke. Luke, this is Amelia. She’s in more classes with you than I am, so you’ll see her more often than me.”

Luke smiled at Michael, and Michael smiled slightly, breathing out a soft correction under his breath, which was just ignored.

“I’m a boy.”

The first bell rang, and Michael quickly ran off to class. But the whole time, he could hardly keep track of all the names his teacher was going over.

“Amelia?”

Michael dropped his head on the table, groaning.

“ _Michael_.”

“Michael who? Last names in your answer.”

Michael sighed, shaking his head.

“I don’t know.”

“You better study then, Miss Clifford.”

Michael gripped at the edge of his desk, ready to tear his hair out. Maybe if he wasn’t so soft looking, or if his shoulders were wider, or his voice was deeper, or if his curves weren’t so womanly, people wouldn’t assume he was a girl.

Luke, for instance, was clearly a boy, with his height and wide shoulders and masculine frame. Michael slammed his head on his desk, causing people to look at him before he left the room for his next class.

**-:-:-:-:-**

“I believe we’ve met.”

Michael looked up as Luke sat beside him.

“Yeah. We have, Hi.”

Luke smiled, turning his chair towards Michael, watching as Michael fiddled with the guitar. Their project in the music class for the day was meant to be partners teaching each other a song on an instrument they both played.

“It’s Amelia, right? I’m Luke.”

Michael’s fingers froze for a second, and he took a slow breath.

“Right, so what song were you planning on teaching me?”

“I have no clue,”

“Well, what’s something you think I can’t play yet?”

Luke hummed for a second as he thought, staring at the guitar.

“Give me a second to think.”

Michael nodded, letting his eyes scan the other students in the room, laughing and talking to each other as they helped with minor - or major - corrections. Their music teacher walked over, clapping Luke on the back.

“Everything all right?”

Luke nodded, gesturing towards Michael.

“Yeah, I was just trying to think of a song she can’t play, so I can teach her.”

“Alright. Tell me if you need help, and I’ll be right over.”

He smiled before walking away to check on another pair as Michael sat there in a stupor.”

“Amelia?”

“No. He.”

“What was that?”

Michael looked at Luke, ‘she’ and ‘her’ constantly running through his mind.

“HE!”

Luke’s eyes widened as Michael’s grip tightened on the guitar, taking it from him.

“It’s alright, calm down Amelia. No? What’s your actual name? I’ll use that instead.”

Michael took a breath, slowly releasing it as he took a moment to answer.

“My name is  _Michael_ , and  _I’m a boy_.”

Luke nodded, ignoring everyone looking at them from Michael yelling.

“Right, sorry for fucking up, Michael.”

Michael grinned at hearing someone call him by his proper name, and he nodded.

“It’s alright.”

Luke nodded, picking up a guitar pick.

“Right, so, back on track so we don’t get zeroes for the day.”


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that although I am writing Michael as a transboy in this fic, I am in fact a cisgirl, and so if I write something incorrectly or offend you, please tell me, and I will change it as soon as I possibly can, as I have no personal experience with trans* issues apart from knowing a few people, and so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.

“So, I heard about your little...outburst in music class the other day.”

Michael flinched slightly as he opened his bedroom door to see his mum, who had apparently been waiting for him to come out of his room.

“How long have you been standing there?”

“I was just about to knock.”

“Right.”

Michael pushed past his mother, heading towards the bathroom to brush his teeth for the night like he had meant to.

“Do you wanna...talk about it?”

Michael’s back stiffened as he heard his mother’s voice from outside of the bathroom door, and he squeezed his toothpaste just a bit too hard at the thought, swearing softly as he spilled toothpaste into the sink, running the water to clean it up.

“Not particularly, no.”

There was the sound of footsteps walking away, and Michael sighed softly, leaning back against the wall, his head thumping against it, still clutching his toothbrush. He didn’t particularly want to be told that he was just “going through a phase” or something like that, and that fear far outweighed any hope of support.

Michael almost threw his toothbrush back in its spot when he finished brushing his teeth, tucking himself in more aggressively than usual, pulling his pillow over his head.

**-:-:-:-:-**

Michael crossed his arms over his chest as he slowly walked into his first class on Monday, trying to ignore the people who looked at him, some clearly laughing, others turning to talk with their friends. He almost turned and walked right back out, but then Luke lifted his head, and Michael stared at him in terror, almost waiting for Luke to join in with everyone else. But Luke just stood and put his hand on Michael’s shoulder, pulling him over to the desk Luke had been sitting at.

“C’mon, over here.”

Michael slouched back into his chair, screwing his eyes shut as his chest seemed to grow heavier and his skin began to crawl, flinching back as he heard the words “She thinks she’s a guy, isn’t that weird?” drift over to him. Luke shifted at the desk next to Michael, and Michael opened his eyes as he heard Luke’s voice, quiet, but quite strong.

“Sorry, what was that?”

“Nothing.”

Luke hummed, leaning forwards on his hands, towards the girl that had spoken.

“Michael is a guy, and I would love it if you were to refer to him as such.”

Luke smiled, and she went pink, nodding furiously. Luke rolled his eyes as he looked at Michael, smiling slightly.

“Don’t you just love people?”

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“You weren’t going to. I just wanted to help out.”

Michael smiled slightly, and for once, he didn’t sit alone at lunch, on a little bench. Instead, Luke dragged him over to a small table, just to keep him company.

“So, what are you doing after school?”

Michael shrugged, picking at the bread on his sandwich.

“Sleeping, probably.”

“You wanna come over instead?”

Michael stared at him, and Luke smiled.

“I’m serious, why are you looking at me like that?”

“I wasn’t expecting that.”

Luke shrugged, stretching slightly.

“Well, I don’t wanna hang out with you purely at school, there’s no video games here.”

Michael grinned, nodding, pulling out his phone to text his mother.

“Yeah, sure, I’d love to hang out.”

**-:-:-:-:-**

“Right, I don’t think my mum is home yet, but here we are.”

“Any reason why you live in the middle of nowhere?”

Luke huffed, unlocking his front door.

“Any reason why you don’t?”

“Civilisation isn’t dangerously far away.”

“Just get inside, will you?”

Michael laughed, stepping inside, only for Luke to grab his arm and pull him along to his bedroom quickly.

“Well, this is escalating quickly.”

Luke turned red, closing the door once they were inside.

“No, I just don’t want my dog jumping all over you.”

Michael laughed, plopping himself down onto Luke’s bed, watching as Luke turned on his television, settling down in front of the consoles he had set up.

“You wanna play Mario Kart?”

“I thought you wanted us to be friends.”

Luke smiled, handing Michael a Wiimote and sitting down beside him.

“Alright, you choose, but if you pick Rainbow Road, I’ll have to kick your ass.”

Michael shook his head, choosing Luigi Circuit instead.

“I thought you thought of me more highly as a person.”

“Any man who chooses Rainbow Road is dangerous and so I need to test you to make sure you won’t like stab me in my sleep or something.”

“Because I’m totally a murderer.”

Luke smiled, shrugging as he picked up a shell, knocking Wario out of the way with it.

“You never know.”

Michael smiled, leaning forwards slightly, focusing on kicking Luke’s ass.

“Could I ask you a question? If it’s not too personal.”

“If you’re gonna ask about my body-”

“No! No, nothing like that.”

Michael relaxed slightly, frowning as Luke hit him with a shell.

“I’ll tell you if it’s rude then, shoot.”

“How do you deal with it?”

“I don’t. I cry like a fucking baby until I feel slightly better and it still doesn’t help because I still look like a girl. That’s not even bad, I just hate the fact that my body doesn’t feel like my body and because of that people constantly call me a girl when I know damn well that I am as much of a guy as you are, even if I don’t have a masculine body.”

“And you’d be more comfortable if you did.”

“Exactly. If I at least had more masculine clothing, that would help as well, but my chest would still make the shirts stick out and the pants wouldn’t fit right, although girl pants are only bad because of the pockets. Fucking fake pockets, who thought that was a good idea?”

“What?”

Michael looked at Luke as he crossed the finish line, raising his eyebrows.

“Yeah, look at this!”

Michael pulled at the seam of his pocket, and Luke frowned, poking at it to find that the pocket indeed did not open.

“Bullshit, I can’t keep anything in these.”

Luke smiled, shaking his head.

“That’s why your phone keeps falling out of your pocket.”

“Yeah, it has to stay in my back pocket, it’s crap.”

Luke laughed, and Michael huffed, crossing his arms.

“Don’t laugh, I’ll put you in my jeans and make you wear them and feel my pain. You’d probably fit in them too.”

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry.”

“You’d better be.”

Luke smiled slightly, stretching out on his bed.

“Michael?”

“Hm?”

“Have you tried writing about your emotions and what caused them instead of crying or something? People generally say that it helps, so maybe it’d be worth a shot?”

Michael sighed, flopping onto his back.

“I dunno, I’m not very good with words, so that might not go super well.”

“Don’t knock until you’ve tried it.”

“I suppose.”

Luke smiled, patting Michael’s cheek before sitting up again.

“Alright, I need to get back to kicking your ass at Mario Kart, up with you, no effort means no fun.”

Michael smiled, sitting up again and thoroughly beating Luke repeatedly until Luke gave up and distracted Michael with food.

 


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that although I am writing Michael as a transboy in this fic, I am in fact a cisgirl, and so if I write something incorrectly or offend you, please tell me, and I will change it as soon as I possibly can, as I have no personal experience with trans* issues apart from knowing a few people, and so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.

**March 12, 2013**

> _Luke told me to start keeping a journal,so I found an old notebook to do this in. Let’s see if it helps at all. Although, with my boring life, I won’t have loads to write, will I?_

 

**April 13, 2013**

> _Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. I don’t know what to do without fucking everything up, what if it all goes wrong or I regret missing out, I’m gonna fuck it up either way. Why me?_

 

“Mikey!”

Michael yelped as Luke hugged him out of nowhere, before laughing and patting what he could reach of Luke’s arms.

“Someone’s cuddly.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Maybe I just missed you.”

“It’s Saturday, I saw you yesterday. Like, literally eighteen hours ago.”

“So?”

“Clingy boy.”

Luke huffed, squeezing Michael.

“You’re a clingy boy too, shut up.”

Michael smiled slightly, patting Luke’s arm again as the taller boy let go.

“So, what’s your reason for ambushing me while I’m in the grocery store getting cookies?”

Luke smiled, looking at the expansive wall of cookies next to them.

“Do you wanna come over?”

Michael narrowed his eyes, holding his cookies tighter.

“You have to get your own cookies.”

“But-”

“I’m not sharing.”

“But we’re best friends!”

Michael shook his head, walking towards the checkout.

“Look, Hemmings, I love you, but I wouldn’t give my own mother any of these cookies.”

“What if I pay you?”

Michael turned around, raising his eyebrows at Luke as he walked backwards.”

“Use that money to buy yourself cookies.”

Luke huffed, grabbing more cookies off the shelf and following Michael. They paid the three or so dollars each for their cookies before heading out, Luke looking at Michael.

“Did you walk here, or-”

Michael nodded in response to Luke’s question, adjusting the string on his hoodie so it wasn’t as uneven.

“Yeah, I only live like ten minutes away, so it wasn’t much of a problem.”

Luke smiled, grabbing Michael’s hand and pulling him over to Luke’s car.

“Well, I’m a lazy asshole, so I drove.”

Michael smiled as he got in the passengers’ seat, still cradling his precious cookies to his chest. They weren’t even amazing cookies in his opinion, he just really wanted to eat them and they weren’t horribly expensive for the box of them that he bought.

“How wonderful.”

“At least I can drive. Why are you cuddling your cookies anyway?”

Michael shifted uncomfortably, mumbling.

“I still have a uterus that’s functional...and it made me want cookies.”

Luke blinked, having completely forgotten.

“Oh, shit, yeah, you do. Well, do you wanna stop and get anything else? Do you need Advil or anything? I don’t know if we have any at my house.”

Michael shook his head, subconsciously using his arm to flatten his chest.

“I have my cookies, I’m fine.”

“Fine, but if you need something, tell me. You can’t be emotionally comfortable during this, even some girls aren’t.”

Michael smiled, patting Luke’s arm.

“It’s alright, I can handle it. I’m a big boy.”

“My little man is all grown up!”

Michael rolled his eyes, flicking Luke’s hand as Luke pretended to wipe a tear away from his eye.

“Quit pretending to cry and just drive, will you? If you crash and kill us, I’ll be pissed because I won’t be able to eat my cookies.”

Luke shook his head, turning down the road to his house and pulling into the driveway.

“Oh, shut up, we’re here anyway.”

“Thank god, you’re an awful driver.”

Michael quickly got out, and Luke huffed, following him.

“Hey!”

Michael just smiled, waiting for Luke to open the front door, the younger boy grumbling the whole time he did so.

“You’re so rude to me, you know that?”

“Oh, shut up.”

Luke stuck his tongue out at Michael, opening the door and letting Michael in.

“Wanna play Dynasty Warriors?”

Michael shook his head as he followed Luke to his bedroom.

“No. I’ll just watch you play. Maybe later.”

Luke nodded, turning on his PlayStation and grabbing a controller, sitting on his bed next to Michael, who had already started in on his cookies.

“Be Cao Cao.”

Luke sighed as he scrolled through the characters, selecting Cao Cao.

“Cao Cao is in every battle though.”

“No, he’s not in like two of them. Besides, you would have picked Lu Bu, and Lu Bu is mine. You can use Liu Bei.”

Luke protested as he ran towards a group of enemies, marked by the red bars over their heads, smacking the officer off her horse.

“No way. What about Xiahou Yuan?”

“You can be the Sun Shangxiang girl instead.”

“I’m already playing.”

Michael laughed, jumping on Luke and taking control of the game, hitting the pause button and quitting the battle.

“Hey!”

Luke went to grab the controller out of Michael’s hands, only for Michael to roll over and throw the controller under his stomach.

“You shit, I was winning!”

Michael laughed, curling up as Luke laid on him, trying to reach the controller.

“Michael, please.”

“Nope.”

The blond whined, completely starfishing on Michael. Michael rolled over, poking Luke’s sides, trying to get him to move, but to no avail.

“Give meeeee.”

“No.”

“Michael, please give me my controller, it’s my only wireless one because I am poor and lazy.”

Luke pouted, and Michael crossed his arms, huffing with a stubborn expression.

“Make me.”

Luke stared at him, shaking his head.

“You’re too stubborn, just give it to me.”

Michael shook his head, still holding the controller with a death grip.

“I said, ‘Make me.’”

“Fine.”

Luke leant in, and Michael made a surprised sound as Luke kissed him, genuinely shocked. With Michael’s surprise, Luke was able to pry his PlayStation controller out of Michael’s fingers, and he grinned, waving it in front of Michael’s fingers.

“Got it.”

“Hey…”

Luke laughed, setting the controller down.

“Hi.”

“You just...why?”

Luke shrugged, pushing himself up.

“If I get the opportunity to kiss a cute person that I like, then I’m definitely gonna take it. Did it bother you, I’m sorry.”

Michael blinked, sitting up and staring at the television as he slowly shook his head.

“No, I just...Did you think of it as...kissing a gi-”

“You’re a boy. I like you because you’re a boy, regardless of what genitalia you were born with. I mean, if you were a girl, I’d still like you, but you aren’t. So, no, I didn’t think of it as kissing a girl, because I kissed a boy.”

Michael smiled, rubbing his red cheeks with his hands as he tried to think over the situation.

“You...like me?”

“Mmhm. I’d ask you out if I wasn’t more concerned with you being comfortable with yourself first.”

“Those could be concurrent.”

Michael picked at his nails as there was a long silence, only the sounds of the ancient Chinese battle based game filling the room for a few minutes as they both thought, Michael mulling over the thought of a relationship with Luke, mentally making a pros and cons list.

“So...Michael, do you want to go out with me?”

 


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that although I am writing Michael as a transboy in this fic, I am in fact a cisgirl, and so if I write something incorrectly or offend you, please tell me, and I will change it as soon as I possibly can, as I have no personal experience with trans* issues apart from knowing a few people, and so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.

**April 27, 2013**

> _I said yes…And, God, he’s way too nice to me…_

 

“Ding dong, Clifford, get up.”

Michael groaned, flopping over in his bed, grumbling into his pillow.

“I don’t wake up before two.”

“And it’s two thirty in the afternoon. This is why I can never take you on cute lunch dates, now get up. I got you a present.”

Michael sat up, running his fingers through his hair.

“Why are you spending money on me?”

“Well, I felt like this was important to you.”

“Is it cheeseburger underwear or something?”

Luke huffed, crossing his arms.

“No, but we can get you some later, if you want.”

Michael rolled his eyes, making grabby hands at the badly wrapped box Luke was holding. Luke bounced on his heels as Michael unwrapped it, grinning at the surprised look on his boyfriend’s face.

“How much was this?”

“Not very much. There are some pretty good binders that aren’t over expensive. I tried to do some research on the brand, but if it’s shitty, just tell me and I’ll get you a new one.”

Michael smiled, jumping to his feet and hugging Luke before pushing him into the hallway.

“Okay, wait here, I’m getting dressed.”

Michael shut the door, happily dressing himself, grinning as he looked at his profile in the mirror before dragging Luke back into his room, gesturing to his flatter chest.

“Binders are like magical boob vanishers.”

Luke laughed as Michael hugged him again, squeezing his red headed boyfriend.

“That’s kind of their purpose, you doof.”

“Shut up.”

Luke smiled, squeezing Michael again, finding the older boy’s happiness contagious.

“Alright, c’mon. This is just part one of more comfy clothes.”

“What?”

Luke grinned, pulling Michael out of his room.

“I’m taking you shopping, no complaints.”

Michael huffed as Luke tugged him outside to his car.

“But I don’t want you spen-”

“I said no complaints.”

Michael grumbled as he got into the car, crossing his arms.

“You’re way too nice to me.”

“And that’s a complaint?”

Michael nodded aggressively as Luke laughed, patting Michael’s thigh.

“You’re adorable.”

Michael made a face at Luke, and Luke smiled, reaching over and turning on the radio so they could sing along - horribly - to the songs playing until Luke pulled up to the store, dragging Michael along to the clothing section.

“Luke-”

“Comfy clothes makes for a comfy boy, c’mon. Happy boyfriends are always nice.”

Michael sighed, and Luke just kissed his nose as they walked over to the shirts.

“My pants are fine, so I guess I’ll just...go through these.”

“What about underwear?”

Michael looked at Luke in surprise, and Luke smiled.

“They’re good for pajamas, at the very least.”

Michael nodded absently, and Luke began going through the clothes to both help Michael out and tease him by holding up horrendously ugly things.  
“What about this?”

Michael looked over at Luke as Luke advanced towards him, making a face and pushing Luke away.

“You get that ‘M’lady’ shirt away from me right now, or I’ll castrate you.”

Luke huffed, putting the moustache adorned shirt back on the rack, standing behind Michael and wrapping his arms around the elder boy.

“I feel like all you’ve picked up are flannels.”

“I have. You said comfy clothes.”

Luke smiled as Michael added another of the plaid shirts to the seven already hanging off his arm.

“Alright, let’s get something else.”

Michael rolled his eyes as Luke picked him up and carried him to the underwear, plopping him down in front of a rack.

“I’m not modelling for you.”

Luke laughed, pressing his face into Michael’s neck, speaking softly.

“What about at home?”

Michael laughed as Luke walked away before tossing a pair of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles boxers at Michael’s face.

“Maybe.”

Luke grinned, ruffling Michael’s hair as he walked by him, heading towards a different rack.

“Hell yeah, I get a sexy underwear model for a boyfriend!”

Michael snorted, throwing a sock at Luke’s head.

“Chill, will you?”

Luke only smiled before shoving more oddly designed underwear into Michael’s arms, cheeseburger boxers among the pairs.

“Alright, now this way.”

Luke pushed him along to the checkout, and Michael rolled his eyes as Luke hummed.

“Are you serious?”

“Are you _not_ swift as a coursing river?”

“I don’t even leave my bed.”

Luke continued humming softly as Michael put his clothes down on the little conveyor belt.

“Then, _Mister, I’ll make a man out of you_.”

Michael shoved Luke’s side, laughing as the woman working the register shot them an annoyed look.

“Miss, please refrain from pushing in the store.”

Michael wrapped his arms around himself, nodding quietly. Luke, however, huffed as he put his wallet away with the change.

“Actually, he’s a guy.”

“He could be a plant for all I care, either way. No pushing and shoving.”

Luke nodded, taking Michael’s hand and the bags. They got into Luke’s car, and Luke looked at Michael.

“You okay?”

Michael snapped out of his silent stupor, smiling ever so slightly.

“Yeah, it’s just...annoying.”

Luke patted Michael’s knee, trying to soothe his boyfriend as he drove.

“I can’t really understand as much as I’d like to, but I’m sorry. But hey, at least you have one person who doesn’t care about your genitals. I mean, unless you would like to use them.”

Luke grinned at Michael as he stopped at a red light, raising his eyebrows suggestively, and Michael laughed, swatting his arm.

“Oh, shut up and drive, you moron.”

Luke looked back at the road, still grinning.

“I didn’t hear a no.”

Michael smiled, looking out the window.

“No, you didn’t.”


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that although I am writing Michael as a transboy in this fic, I am in fact a cisgirl, and so if I write something incorrectly or offend you, please tell me, and I will change it as soon as I possibly can, as I have no personal experience with trans* issues apart from knowing a few people, and so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.

**July 19, 2013**

> _I hope he still thinks of me as me and not as Amelia after this, I don’t think I could take that pain._

Luke hummed to himself as he absentmindedly trailed his fingers up and down Michael’s leg, not even paying attention to whatever movie they were meant to be watching. Michael looked up from where he was sprawled across Luke’s lap on his bed, staring at his blond boyfriend. Luke looked at Michael, smiling.

“Hi.”

“You’re not even watching the movie.”

Luke shrugged, drumming his fingers against Michael’s stomach.

“You’re pretty distracting.”

Michael rolled his eyes, and Luke bent over, kissing him.

“You are, you’re adorable.”

“Cos I’m all soft.”

Luke furrowed his eyebrows in confusion at Michael’s words.

“Soft? I think you’re cute regardless of ‘softness’, you’re just adorable.”

Michael crossed his arms, huffing.

“That’s cos you haven’t seen me naked, so you can’t tell how soft I am.”

Luke raised an eyebrow, patting Michael’s stomach.

“Cos I don’t care how soft you are, the only thing that I’d notice if you were naked would be-”

“My boobs and lack of a dick.”

Luke huffed, slightly annoyed that Michael was talking about himself in such a negative tone.

“I already told you, I don’t care about your genitals, and I’ll only ask about them if we’re having sex and I don’t know what’ll make you feel good or what you want me to do. I don’t give a single fuck about what’s under your clothes unless you want me to put my mouth there.”

To Luke’s surprise, Michael began laughing, and sat up to kiss him.

“That sounded like really bad dirty talk.”

Luke smiled, shaking his head.

“You really only have a one track mind. But did it work?”

Michael took a small breath before grinning.

“Well, why don’t you find out?”

**-:-:-:-:-**

**December 17, 2013**

> _Fuck, he’s gonna hate me, he can’t hate me, I don’t know what to do, I’m gonna shoot myself, I can’t do this, this is too much for me fuck_

Luke pulled up to Michael’s house, almost running to the door. He was half asleep, but after Michael’s panicked, tear filled 3am phone call to him, begging him to come over, Luke had sped the whole way there. The door immediately opened, and Michael yanked Luke inside, only for Luke to hug him tightly, rubbing his back to try and offer him at least some comfort.

“What’s wrong, are you okay?”

Michael shook his head furiously, tearing himself away from Luke to shut the door, slowly walking towards his bedroom as if he dreaded the next step every time he moved his feet.

“Michael?”

“I need to show you something.”

Luke frowned, slowly following Michael to his room, asking the question he already knew the answer to.

“Is everything okay?”

Michael shut the door, sitting on his bed, holding something white out towards Luke.

“I guess it broke once or had some hole we didn’t know about, I dunno.”

Luke stared down at the plastic stick in his hands, his mouth opening as he looked at the two lines on it.

“This...this is...you’re…”

Michael wiped his face, nodding.

“It’s a test, I’m pregnant.”

Luke dropped it, sitting down and pulling Michael into his lap, hugging him.

“I’m...do you want it?”

Michael flailed his hands in distress, his chest heaving as his eyes watered up again, Luke gently brushing away the tears that spilled down his cheeks.

“It’s okay, calm down. You don’t have to have it.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, but I can’t, I can’t do it, I found out three days ago, and I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t look at myself, I can barely even fucking breathe, I can’t carry this baby, I’m sorry Luke.”

Luke just held Michael tighter, hushing him as Michael babbled on through his tears.

“It’s okay, you don’t ever have to have a baby, it’s your body, I don’t mind if you don’t want to keep it, I got you into this mess anyway, I’m so sorry. If my opinion means a damn thing at all, I don’t think you should keep it anyway, I don’t want you to deteriorate mentally, I don’t want you to go through that, I just want you to be happy and safe, and if this isn’t gonna do that, then I don’t want you to carry a baby.”

Michael visibly sighed in relief, slumping against Luke.

“Okay, I just...needed to hear that it wouldn’t be selfish.”

Luke shook his head, rubbing Michael’s back.

“Definitely not. We can set up an appointment tomorrow, and I’ll take you, alright?”

Michael nodded, taking the tissue Luke handed him.

“I love you.”

Luke smiled, kissing the top of Michael’s head.

“I love you too. And we can adopt however many babies you want someday so you don’t have to give birth, alright?”

Michael laughed as he wiped his eyes, nodding.

“Okay.”


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that although I am writing Michael as a transboy in this fic, I am in fact a demigirl, and so if I write something incorrectly or offend you, please tell me, and I will change it as soon as I possibly can, as I have no personal experience with trans* issues apart from knowing a few people, and so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated. (yes, that says demigirl now and not cisgirl, gender is fluid, and mine has changed)

**December 21, 2013**

> _Well, that wasn’t completely awkward in any way at all, nope._

 

Michael groaned at the soft knock on his bedroom door, rolling out of bed to open it. His mother was standing in front of him, smiling nervously.

“Can I talk to you?”

Michael’s body seized up, and he forced out a slow breath.

“Uhm-”

The doorbell rang, and Michael looked at the time, shaking his head.

“Actually, I think Luke just got here.”

“Good.”

Michael nodded absentmindedly, heading out of his room to the front door to let Luke in.

“Hi.”

Luke smiled, kissing Michael as he took his hoodie off.

“Hi. Is your mum home, or should I order pizza so you have dinner?”

Michael smiled, shaking his head.

“No, she’s home.”

Luke nodded, and Michael pulled him along to his bedroom, stopping short of seeing his mum still in there.

“Hi, mum.”

Luke smiled, waving with the hand that wasn’t in Michael’s.

“Good afternoon, Mrs Clifford.”

She smiled slightly.

“Good, you’re here. I need to talk to you two.”

Michael sighed, going into his room and flopping onto the bed, mumbling.

“Aw, shit.”

Luke caught the hint, sitting next to Michael.

“I haven’t mentioned it to your dad, but uhm…”

Karen pulled out a plastic stick, looking at Luke for any signs of negativity or surprise.

“Amelia, what the hell is this?”

Michael took a slow breath, and Luke patted his knee, trying to comfort him.

“A pregnancy test? A positive one?”

“And it’s yours.”

Michael nodded, crossing his arms.

“But it’s been taken care of, don’t worry about it.”

Karen raised her eyebrows, looking at Luke.

“The baby is yours?”

“It would have been, yes.”

“Would have?”

Michael looked down at his lap, staring at Luke’s hand.

“There’s not gonna be any baby.”

“You...so you…”

Michael nodded slowly, looking up at his mother, who seemed slightly surprised.

“I had a abortion, yeah. Two days after I told Luke.”

“But why?”

“My mental health is more important than any clump of cells, Luke knows that, I know that, so I went through with it. I can’t have a baby, I’m not ready to raise a child, and having my own child would ruin my mental state completely. I couldn’t.”

Karen slowly nodded, setting the test down.

“Right, I understand, And you support her?”

Luke blinked at the question being directed at him.

“It’s not my uterus, I can’t make decisions concerning it, so yes, I support the decision.”

It was quiet as they all stared at the floor, Karen breaking the silence minutes later.

“What made you decide you couldn’t do it? Your father and I would have helped, we wouldn’t have let our baby girl do it alone, if that was the source of the mental health issue.”

Michael sighed, looking at Luke hesitantly.

“It’s up to you.”

Michael nodded, looking at his mother.

“Uhm...as a, uh. Dysphoria.”

Karen’s eyebrows drew together in confusion, and she folded her hands as she spoke.

“What does that mean, exactly?”

Michael ran his hand through his hair, stammering.

“I-it’s, uhm, the thought of-of, y’know, _being_ pregnant, uhm….made me feel like a-a girl. And...I’m _not_.”

Karen nodded slightly, speaking slowly.

“So, you’re, ah, a boy? Is that it? Like, a-uhm, I can’t remember the word, a-”

Michael nodded, holding Luke’s hand with a death grip.

“I’m transgender, yeah.”

Her face lit up in understanding, and she nodded.

“That makes sense, okay, yeah. Should I still call you Amelia?”

Michael shook his head furiously.

“No, no, no. Sorry mum, I love the name, but it doesn’t fit me.”

“It’s Michael, he prefers Michael.”

Karen nodded, pointing at Michael.

“My _son_. _His_ name is _Michael_. _He_ is a _boy_.”

She repeated this a few times, and Michael hastily wiped away the tears brimming at his eyes.

“Anything else I should know?”

Michael shrugged, looking at Luke.”

“I’m gay?”

Karen just smiles leaning over and kissing Michael’s forehead.

“Can I tell your dad?”

Michael nodded,and she patted his shoulder and left. As soon as the door shut, Michael turned and buried his face in Luke’s shoulder. Luke rubbed his back, smiling.

“Alright?”

“That went so much better than I expected.”

“I felt like I was third-wheeling.”

Michael just laughed, squeezing Luke in a hug.

 


End file.
